But Not Out of The Closet. Is He Or Isn’t He? Only His Bishop Knows For Sure.
Poor Senator Craig. For the last two days the country and the state of Idaho, not to mention the good Senator’s wife and children, discovered for the first time that their Senator, husband and father pled guilty months ago to something or other that dear Kerfuffles finds a bit too icky to explain. Said icky nastiness happened in the men’s restroom in a Minnesota airport, far from both Idaho and Washington. The good Senator Larry Craig has been hither and yon defending himself and claiming that he is NOT nor NEVER has been “Gay”. In addition, he has made it quite clear that he is totally innocent until “proven” guilty by a jury of his peers. HA - Where oh, Where will Minnesotans find a jury of Larry’s peers? Yes, yes, yes, he did “plead” guilty, but remember legally that a “pled” is not the same as a “proven” guilty.
Is Larry Craig a Closeted Mormon?
Not content with having a Republican Senator involuntarily outed, this time by the police and not by other Gays, the liberal Democrats have gone totally berserk and are accusing him of being a Mormon to boot. After all, Craig is a mucketty muck big time supporter of presidential wannabee, Mitt Romney. And Idaho is out there somewhere near that expanse of wilderness that Brigham Young claimed 150 years ago or so. Ta da! One plus one equals Mormon! This has spun the one man spin-machine of Larry Craig so fast and hard, that he has been turned into a pink fluff of stick-icky cotton candy. Now he is really mad, as evidenced by the following press release:
Now, I can understand some people, such as the entire Republican Senate and that vicious news rag “Idaho Statesman”, concluding falsely that I am homosexual, as after all there have been a number of hints and clues throughout the years, and now there is my Minnesota guilty plea to Gayness. However, to tar and feather me as a Mormon is beyond the pale. I am not now nor have I ever been a Mormon. This is the most disgusting slur that has ever been hurled at me during all of my decades of public service. I want to make this perfectly clear. I am an innocent victim, and there is NO way any liberal Democrat is going to trick me into pleading guilty to Mormonism.
Senator Craig claims to be NOT Roman Catholic either, however his spin staff released the following image of him attending confession:
Is Larry Craig a Closeted Mormon? He must be, as only the Liberal Democrats know about it.
Ruffles and Flourishes to “Left ‘Toon Lane” for the cartoon.
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