atheismJanuary 17, 2006 4:43 pm

“So He Sent Me.”

There are two things Navy Seals are always taught:

1. Keep your priorities in order.

2. Know when to act without hesitation.

A college professor, an avowed atheist and active member of the A.C.L.U., was teaching his class. He shocked his students when he flatly stated that he was going to
prove to them that there was no God. Addressing the heavens, he cried: “GOD, if you are real, then strike me dumb and knock me down, and do it in exactly 15 minutes.”

The lecture room was hushed and silent as ten minutes passed. You could hear a pin
drop. “I’m waiting God, if you’re real, knock me off this platform.”

Again, after four minutes, the professor taunted the Almighty saying, “Here I am, God! I’m still waiting!%2

Kerfuffles, America, news, humor, satire, religion, atheist, atheismSeptember 21, 2005 12:32 pm

Church of the Non-believers

Thomas Jefferson, unbeknownst to him during his lifetime, may now become the father of this newly founded religious movement. Because of his supposed advocacy for separation of church and state he is a hero to “The Secular Coalition for America”.

Lori Lipman Brown is the executive director of this new movement whose stated goals are to keep religion out of government and to win respect for a stigmatized minority. Needless to say, her self-described “stigmatized minority” are people who “espouse” atheism, and also needless to say, her stated goals are not the real ones of this group.

Dictionary.com defines “atheism” as (1) a disbelief in or denial of the existence of God or gods or the doctrine that there is no God or gods; and (2) Godlessness and immorality. Hum. It appears to me that Dictionary.com is a bit behind the curve, so to speak with that definition (2). They will change it real soon, after a trip to the woodshed with the new “Reverendess” Brown. They give the definition of “atheist” simply as “one who disbelieves or denies the existence of God or gods“, which seems to be an acceptable meaning by most people.

There have always been atheists round and about as long as any of us can remember. They didn’t go to church or synagogue, they didn’t pray and they didn’t proselytize as Christians have been commanded by their God. They just didn’t believe in all that stuff, so they pretty much ignored it. It was kind of like not believing in Santa Clause, or horoscopes or rabbits’ feet. If others wanted to believe, why would the non-believer care? I don’t know because I never knew they did care.

Well, now that atheists seem to be organizing into some sort of religious cult, they seem to care a lot about what you and everyone else who is not an atheist believes. In fact, the basic tenants of Brown’s newly organized congregation or church seem to be based mainly on fundamentalist Christianity, with heavy emphasis on “spreading the word“, albeit with a slight twist. Whatever it is that the “Fundies” believe in, Reverendess Brown’s atheist congregation will be fundamentally against and will work diligently to put asunder.

Lori Lipman Brown plans to work for her new church by fighting policies rooted in Christian religious beliefs, such as limits on stem cell research and access to emergency contraception. She is going to oppose policies that breach the “non-existant” wall between church and state, such as government funding of “faith-based” service programs.

Reverendess Brown plans to represent non-believers in other ways “such as eliminating references to God from the U.S. oath of citizenship“. She plans to stay out of the Pledge of Allegiance kerfuffle for now because “the courts are on our side“. She said those words in reference to the federal judge who recently reaffirmed an earlier ruling that teacher-led recitation of the Pledge’s phrase “under God” in public schools is unconstitutional.

Lori Brown said “the courts are on our side”. So there you have it from the “First American Congregation of Atheists”. One could say, for a group of “non-believers“, that they certainly do have a lot of strongly held beliefs. So much for that wall of separation between “church and state” that they claim from their dearly beloved Thomas Jefferson.

In a recent Pew Research Center poll, only 3% of Americans said they do not believe in God or a spirit or power, yet only 1% said they are atheists (those who believe there is no God). Another 2% said they are agnostics (those unsure whether there is a God), and 11% of the respondents said they have no religious preference. Herb Silverman, president of the Secular Coalition for America, counts these “no religious preference” folks as non-believers — and includes them as members of his “30-million-strong” First American Congregational Atheists.

The definition of “religion” is “a cause, principle, or activity pursued with zeal or conscientious devotion“, and that certainly seems to apply to this organized group of atheists. Already they have confirmed many into the new non-believer religion without even their knowledge. For example it is a well know factoid that many who are labeled as atheists are often agnostics, neo-pagans or non-observant Jews, or all three in one. Sometimes even observant Christians will claim to be atheists even while purchasing Christmas trees and singing holiday carols. There are many followers of Discordianism and the Church of the SubGenius who are also atheists. Self-described atheists often claim to be influenced by Zen Buddhism or Taoism or other `native‘ religions in their moral pinnings. Will the new religion of “non-believers” be inclusive enough to allow gnostics, wizards, wickens and demons to join?

Tracked at “basil’s blog” Covered Dish Party and “Mudville Gazette”’s Open Post.